Randy's Story: Cheated on with a whore (part 2)

After getting married Randy relocated to a different city about an hour away. A year later her and her husband bought a beautiful home in a nice neighborhood. She decorated it very retro-urban and the interior looks like something you might see on MTV’s Cribs. It was very Randy: stylish, stands out, and probably expensive.

Randy used to complain about certain things in her relationship. I never thought it was a big deal or there were serious issues going on. I don’t even think she thought any of it was that serious. To me her complaints were natural obstacles. They were young, spoiled, and stubborn-so maybe they were just learning how to adjust to compromise and selflessness. I mean sure there were things that she told us that would bother me too, but no relationship is perfect and she’s one of those people that’s pretty honest and open and will probably reveal things that most girls won’t.

At some point Randy would make off-handed halfway-joking statements about not knowing how long she’s going to stay married for, or she thinks she wants a divorce. But she’s the type of person that would say things like that when she’s pissed off; she can be pretty dramatic. So I really didn’t think they were having serious issues-I don’t think any of us were.

Amongst the things she complained about was that he was pressuring her into having kids now. She didn’t like her meddling in-laws. He was making plans that didn’t include her, and decisions without consulting her. He was taking on a lot of extracurricular activities, and thus he was gone away from home more and more. Despite that, I don’t really think she was serious about wanting a divorce…but I just think she was really frustrated.

About 3 weeks ago while they were in a car together HE told her calmly that he wasn’t happy and wants a divorce. He had an explanation about her being in the way of the things he wanted to do and bla bla bla. She knew it was final and in the next couple of days she took her things and moved in to her parents’ house. His announcement came right after he came back from a trip with one of his friends and she had a very strong feeling that something must have happened.

At that point she wasn’t interested in trying to work things out with him, but she knew there was something he wasn’t saying and she was interested in knowing the whole truth. She suspected he was probably going to tell his family some bullshit story about her that they would probably spread to remove him from any fault in what’s inevitably going to be a messy split. So she was very determined to find out what was really going on and gather all the ammunition she can.

Sub7anallah her answer came very easily. It was like God really really wanted her to know. A few days ago she found an abundance of solid proof that her asshole husband is intimately involved with another woman. He probably has short-term memory because……..well let’s just say he didn’t do a good job of covering his tracks….AT ALL.

What’s very strange is that the girl he cheated on her with is a girl that’s probably a lot like Randy in terms of her personality. That was the impression Randy got of her from all the evidence that came her way. Why would you cheat on your wife with someone that reminds you of your wife? The biggest difference though is that this girl is a dancer whore. I don’t like to use that word, but for money she entertains strangers by dancing with little clothes on and is having an affair with a man she knows is married. This chick even admitted to him in an email that she was getting cozy with ANOTHER guy because she didn’t think he would mind. So can you think of a better word?

I know this isn’t about me, but I’ve been sad lately. Sometimes when I’m by myself and I reflect on what happened and what she’s going through I just start crying. When she came over for lunch on Friday I asked her to think back during the time when he asked for her or during the engagement. Were there any red flags that she wished she picked up on? She said there was nothing really, at some point in the marriage he just kind of changed. That made me even more depressed to hear. In life you have no real guarantees and no real assurances. You could be doing everything you’re supposed to do and you never know what kind of tragedy is waiting around the corner to blow up in your face. You could be making all the right decisions, yet they could still result in pain and loss.

Life is scary like that.