The fact that I don't drink and don't like to be around it has definitely formed somewhat of a schism between me and my colleagues. I've realized that people who want to drink don't like to be around people that don't drink when all they want to do is get drunk. Maybe it makes them feel bad about themselves since such extreme behavior is associated with social irresponsibility and immaturity (there are some serious alcoholics in my class).
I was out with a colleague recently after an exam and although she didn't say anything I felt that it was bothering her that she couldn't drink, much less get drunk. She kept asking about the drinks and browsing the drink menu but then hesitating and not ordering each time. I didn't suggest to her that her drinking would bother me, but she knows I don't drink and may have felt too self-conscious to do that around me.
I've learned that when people are under a lot of stress and have little free time they usually would prefer to spend it getting crazy drunk, probably to get as far away from the mental pressure as possible, which I admit can really break you if you don't find your outlet. I'm still trying to find mine. It's not fair! why can't it be that easy for me too? Finding that outlet on the spiritual level is quite powerful, but it takes a lot more effort and sometimes it's not there. and yea this is totally related to the "becoming bad" post on my old diary some of you may have read.
What inspired all these thoughts at this moment is a recent facebook chat I had with an upperclassman
moomoo: am good
how r u?
Asma: I'm ok
I sent you a text, did you get it
I'm gonna see a movie tonight with a friend, you're welcometo join us
Moomoo: well i got ur message
but am depressed
Asma : :(
Moomoo: soo am going to get drunk