My take on the Hijabi Monologues

I saw the show recently. It was AMAZING!

The widely acclaimed show is the Muslim version spinoff of the popular Vagina Monologues. Going to it I was a bit skeptical and was expecting it to be perhaps corny and cheesy and not very intellectual, but nevertheless I still thought I’d enjoy some light-hearted humor. My preconceived notions wasn’t because I don’t think anything is intellectual about being a hijabi in America, but just because I thought it was probably going to be so PC and censored since us hijabis have to represent all the damn time and all. ESPECIALLY since it’s real actresses performing real stories and not an anonymous author operating under a pseudoname. MAN was I was completely mistaken. For starters, this show is barely PG-13 rated.

The very first skit was about how us hijabis in America are always expected to be the walking public representation of Islam. In it, a girl is confronted by a man using violent language towards her and she wishes to reply in a similar fashion. I’m a hijabi by choice, but I did not choose to wear hijab because I wanted to represent Islam. That is a responsibility that’s way beyond me to handle. I make mistakes and I’m far from perfect. The mistakes I make should be a representation of me, and not my beliefs. When I see those thoughts and feelings of mine that frankly most people who don’t wear hijab just don’t understand come to life in that skit, I was moved to tears. It was such a huge relief to know that others feel the same way and it doesn’t make me a bad Muslim.

I loved the whole show: the FSU vs. UM college football game experience, the tale of aysha and ameer (which may have been a bit removed from reality), that what types of guys hit on girls in hijab skit, and especially the story of the post 9/11 arrest of Dr.sami al arian as told through the eyes of his daughter-another great tear jerker. However it was that very first skit I talked about in the previous paragraph that inspired something in me. Especially when during the show my non-hijabi glam friend sitting behind me texted me that she hates it and thought it was "humiliating" and a bad representation of Islam.

With that said I have something to say to all of those Muslim men, to the non-hijabis, and to those self-righteous hijabis who love to judge other hijabis. If I hear any comments about how non-hijabi like someone’s dress code is, how scandalous your holy brain believes it is it is that you saw a hijabi sitting with a table full of White guys in a restaurant, how shameful your genious mind thought it is that you saw a hijabi smoking hookah and singing along to an Arabic song, how outrageous it is that you heard a hijabi tell someone to 'kiss my ass', and how your highness thinks some hijabi is giving Islam a bad name because of A, B, and C and whatever else your momma taught I just want to say…………….FUCK YOU and FUCK YOU!

Do I have a sign on my back that says "JUDGE ME PLEASE" or one that says "IDENTIFY ALL MY IMPERFECTIONS"? Get a life and leave mine alone please. Go mind your own business before you mind mine. People like you create a society that makes my life harder than it needs to be. Sorry to break it to you, but I actually don’t answer to you or your momma, I answer to Allah (swt). You may not realize it but there is a lot of harm in your judgements. You see when I start to have to worry about what people like you are going to say, I lose sight of the bigger picture and my purpose of being here on Earth. My intentions start turning into "SHIT what's UmAli going to think?" instead of "Allah (swt) forbade me to do this". Maybe your own actions are motivated by what UmAli's flavor of the month is, but I don't care...or at least I try not to care.

Do you get my point? Now please, go worry about your own self before you "worry" about me.